"Letting go has never been easy, but holding on can be as difficult. Yet strength is measured not by holding on, but by letting go."
- Len Santos
Letting go can be difficult. Downright emotional. Stressful. ...and Wonderful.
After more than 3 years of working for the same company, I've decided to move on. I'll be moving from PA to FL in two weeks, and starting a new job. It's a tough decision because my current company is great, the area is nice, I have a wonderful group of friends here, and my incredible boyfriend just moved back. So, to say I'm emotionally vested is an understatement.
Why leave?
There are a million reasons that help this decision make sense. And, quite frankly, almost as many that say it doesn't. But, as I was trying to figure it all out...I realized that I was almost paralyzed with fear; the thought of leaving my comfort zone was just plain scary. I was afraid to 'abandon' my managers, coworkers, customers, and friends...And it made me sick thinking that my fear may be holding me back.
The more I obsessed over the decision, I realized my fear was around leaving the familiar. I was more afraid of leaving the "known"...and less afraid of embarking upon the "unknown". Basically put, I was afraid to stop working here - but super excited to start somewhere else.
What lies ahead is guaranteed to be a challenge...personally and professionally. New company, new role, new friends, new home, new experiences....new, new, new!
"All glory comes from daring to begin."
-Eugene F Ware quotes
The funny thing is - I remember having a similarly heart-wrenching time deciding to leave my first corporate job, too. I spent three years there, working full-time while in college...and really struggled with letting go. Looking back, I couldn't have made a better decision! And while I won't belabor the reasons I chose to leave my first or current job...I'll say this: Life is all about priorities.
I'm reminded of my 5th-grade self. I was probably at my best then. Hadn't given in to the pressures of societal norms. Wore my baggy shirts and knock-off converses with pride. And was certain that I would rule the world (before the 7th grade, if possible). And I wasn't willing to let anyone or anything get in the way of that. Not even fear.
On the last day of school, the entire 5th-grade population seemed to be crying hysterically. And as I said goodbye to my friends, I remember being one of the only people with dry eyes, thinking to myself: "If these people are important enough for me to cry over them, I'm sure we'll keep in touch." I just didn't get it. It probably seemed heartless at the time - but I knew that there were greener pastures ahead. At 26, I'm slightly more emtional than I was at 11...but, the principle remains true. It's tough to let go - but sixth grade bigger and better things await.
So, as I continue to Let Go over the next two weeks - I'll channel my 5th-grade, more level headed self and repeat the mantra over and over again...
I'm sure we'll keep in touch.
